I am a 28 yr old, white female. I was born in California.
I come from an alcoholic family, but my mother did her best with raising two kids on her own. My biological father tried to kill her when I was 2 years old. She got away. He died when I was 16 of a drug overdose. She later fell for an alcoholic a-hole who did nothing but abuse her and free load off of her. I do not blame my mother for what has transpired in life. She held up well with the cards life dealt her. She never let me feel unwanted, unloved or ashamed of who I was, or where I came from.
In actuality, my childhood hardships strengthened who I am. I moved out when I was 18, after being the first and only member of my immediate or extended family to graduate high school. I pulled a 3.86 GPA. I was among the top 100 of my class. I had dreams and aspirations of college and more.
Since I came from a poor family, I didn't have money to pay for college. So, I joined the Marine Corps. I signed an 8 year contract and became a supply clerk. I earned the GI Bill to fund my tuition. I thoroughly enjoyed my service to my country. I would do it again in a heart beat. I was honorably discharged after 5 years of active duty (3 years inactive to remain) right before they sent my entire unit over to Iraq. When 9/11 hit, we were all in the warehouse watching the little black and white TV on the Staff Sergeants desk. I was ready and willing to fight back at those who so horrifically hurt us. I never got the chance. When it came time for re-enlistment, there were no spaces left in my job for me to re-up.
I had met my husband through the Marines. We were in the same unit. I had never truly fallen in love before and I'm not sure if I will again. I gave my all to my marriage. I have since learned, through counseling and Alanon, that I have a co-dependant nature and that's why I stayed as long as I did. I believed I could help him change, not change him. I truly, sincerely believe in the good of people and I had the mindset of so be it. I cannot think this way anymore. I do still believe there is good in people, I just can't keep giving and giving when its not healthy. I need to be the mother my wonderful boys deserve. I need to break the cycle and show them how to be normal, healthy, well-adjusted men. I have a strong will, patience overflowing, and enough love to get me through...however, that doesn't fund a lawyer. I will do whatever it takes to make life better for my kids. I am secondary, though I realize they need me.
I went to a technical college and attained an A.A.S degree in Medical Assisting. I went to school and worked full time while I was pregnant. I have a drive that keeps me going. I had our second son on a Thursday and was back to school and work the following Monday. There is no rest for the weary. I will continue to work hard because I fervently hope that one day, it will pay off.
I am going back to school to get my B.A. in Social Work. I want to help children and families get help out of bad situations. I feel it is one of the ways I can give back to society.
I truly want to be a good, honest person. I truly feel that I have always tried to be. I have made mistakes in my life and I want to learn from them and do better in the future.
If you ever have questions, please let me know. I am open. Thank you for reading.
